The warm breeze hit him in the face as he looked out across the open
field. So much had changed in the past six months. He had turned eighteen,
he had graduated high school, and now, thanks to his parents, Jason was
going to college. The very thought of more school sickened him. He had
spent twelve years in the prison that was called school. The fact was,
Jason had no direction at all. He knew that he liked to have fun, but his
father preached that hard work would bring happiness, fun would not.
Somehow Jason figured that was not true.
Jason grew up in a small
farming community in central Kentucky called Ballard. He and his parents
lived in the exact house that his grandparents and his great-grandparents
had lived in. Growing up on a farm kept Jason busy most of the time. His
strict catholic parents were relentless. It seemed that all he could
remember of his childhood was his parents yelling at him. They were not
the most patient of parents that was for sure.
Jason had one job on
the farm. He milked the cows, twice a day, 365 days a year. It was not his
favorite job, but compared to the things that his older brother and sister
had to help with, he considered himself lucky. Still, Jason found that
this never-ending chore took most of his time. He had friends, they were
farm kids as well, so they were busy just like he was. They often got
together after the chores were done for the night at the local Catholic
Church parking lot, Saint Ivo. Jason rarely stayed as late as the other
kids did, his parents were quite strict with his curfew. He was to be home
and in bed by 9:30. Many times, Jason would only go up to his room and
pretend that he was in bed, having quietly climbed out on the porch roof
and down a column of the front porch and out to the road where he met his
friends, Mike and Jacob. Being from a catholic family, alcohol was never
hard to find. They would ride in Jacob’s truck and drink, even though
neither three was nineteen.
Now Jason was a strange combination of
happy, sad and scared. He was happy to be leaving the farm and all of its
time consuming chores. He liked the fact that he would be in the dorm,
away from all of his parent’s rules and yelling. Jason was scared simply
because his world was changing. In a month he would be loading his things
up in his blazer and driving the 72 miles to Saint Catherine College (one
more decision that his family controlled, he was sent to a catholic
college with nuns and priests and the whole works). At least Mike would be
with him, they had decided to go to the same college or at least their
parents had decided.
Mike was the best friend that a guy could
have. Since they were six years old, Jason and Mike were inseparable,
spending every free moment together. They liked the same things like
horseback riding, singing, and of course masturbation. It had been about 7
years ago when Mike and Jason had discovered the neat little trick that
their privates could do. Many hours were spent in the hayloft, the milk
room, and the feed shed exercising their boyhood cocks. Mike was tall, 6’4
and thin. His dark hair was often covered by his red cap. His back was
browned by the long hours spent in the fields plowing and raising his
families’ tobacco crop. Mike’s dark brown eyes were mesmerizing, so
innocent, yet so devious and a killer smile, the girls loved him. He
played basketball and was very strong and athletic. He made A’s in math
and could tear a tractor motor apart and put it back together with ease.
Jason was much smaller than Mike. They were quite an odd couple. Jason
was 5’6 and thin. His blue eyes were like the sky and his hair was a
strange mixture of blond and black. He too was athletic, but his size made
him choose another sport, baseball. He was very quick on his feet and
quite deadly on the baseball field, it was the only thing that his parents
adjusted the rules for. When baseball season came around, the chores were
adjusted for practice and games. While Jason was good at the game, it
never really interested him like it did his teammates. His father had
pushed him into it, and he had gone along just to please him, but it had
quirks, no milking chores through the week. Jason was the academic of the
family. He passed physics with no problem, barely cracking a book and
could write a paper the night before it was due and make it sound as
though he had spent weeks researching it. He was popular with the girls as
well, but was strictly forbidden to date. His parents were determined that
what happened to his older brother would not happen to him.
Jason
took a deep breath, smelling the grass around him, he turned and walked
toward the barn, it would soon be time to milk the cows. Garth Brook’s
song “the thunder rolls” played through his mind as he hummed along. As he
approached the barn, he could hear the calves bawling for their mothers.
The barn had a familiar smell, or as familiar as the smell of cow shit
could be. Mike crossed his mind, Jason wondered what he was going to do
tonight, and he decided that he would give him a call when his chores were
done. Jason opened the door and began assembling the tools for the night’s
chores.
Jason hurried through the chores, and jogged to the house.
As he came around the corner of the tool shed he heard some tools
rattling. He stuck his head in the door to see his brother and his father
replacing some of the blades on the disk. The very sight of them made his
stomach churn. Gary, Jason’s older brother, had always been the favorite.
He stood 6’ tall and had powerful muscles across his chest and in his
arms. He looked so much like their father, that Jason had trouble telling
them apart from behind. He started to go in but then decided not to, who
needed a long explanation of how one should learn to do their own
mechanics as it would save lots of money. Jason turned toward the house.
He watched some sort of bird perch on the eve of the house and he could
smell supper cooking. The sun was going down and the air was getting
cooler as he went in the front door.
“Jason take those nasty boots
off!” his mother warned.
“Yes mom.” He mumbled.
“Mike
called, wanted you to call him I think”, his mom said as she turned the
steak over in the frying pan.
“What time did he call?”
“About twenty minutes ago” she said impatiently.
Jason kicked off
his boots and ran up the stairs and dialed the phone as he flipped on his
stereo. He put Pink Floyd in because he knew his mother disapproved. The
phone rang twice as he heard a deep voice on the other end say “hello.”
“Mr. Mattingly, this is Jason, can I speak to Mike?”
“Yeah hold
on a sec.”
Jason held the phone as he heard his mother at the
bottom of the stairs yell “turn that shit down!” He rolled his eyes and
giggled to himself as Mike’s voice came on the other end. “Hey guy what’s
up?” Mike said enthusiastically.
“Not much for real, just getting
yelled at, you know the usual”, Jason laughed.
“Whatcha doin
tonight?”
“Not much, guess I’ll go up to the church and hang out
for awhile, you seen Jacob?”
“Yeah I talked to him this morning,
said he was going to Frankfort with Kirsten, guess he’s hard up and needs
some”, Mike laughed.
“Well what is new with that? Guess he will be
back afterwards to brag” Jason laughed “guess it is just you and me then,
are you bringing the drink?”
“Yeah my cousin Brad got a bottle of
Makers Mark for me last night, should make our night pass quite well, ya
think?” Mike bragged.
“No doubt! I will meet ya there around
eight.”
“Sure thing guy, later!”
Jason chucked off his jeans
and his T-shirt and pitched them in the corner knowing that his mother
hated it when he left things in the floor like that. Grabbing some clean
underwear and socks, he dug through the pile of clean clothes on the chair
at the end of the bed and snatched some blue-jean shorts and his Old Navy
T-shirt and headed for the shower.
Jason closed his eyes and let
the hot water hit his face. His mind wondered back to the hill that he had
stood on earlier in the day, the yellow flowers in the pasture, the blue
sky, the black and white of the cows and their sharp contrast to the
bright green of the grass. His image was interrupted as he heard his
father beating on the bathroom door, yelling “water is not free it can’t
take that long for you to wash.” Jason rolled his eyes and cussed under
his breath at his father. Over the years, Jason had grown to dislike his
father. Nothing he did ever seemed to be enough to impress that man. All
that he ever heard was stinging criticism. He could not recall the number
of times that he was encouraged to be more like his older brother.
Jason reached down and turned off the water and felt around the curtain
for a towel. He pulled the curtain back and stepped out of the shower. He
could see himself in the mirror. The water shined on his hairless body,
his brown nipples and the line of muscles that outlined his chest and
stomach. He posed for a minute to look at himself in the mirror, admiring
how his cock hung down. It was not huge, but an impressive seven and a
half inches. He smiled at himself as he threw on some deodorant and
cologne. He slid into his clean clothes and paused before he opened the
bathroom door. He knew that he would have to make a quick get away if he
was to escape the twenty questions and harsh advice that awaited him in
the kitchen. He took a deep breath and opened the door. He walked swiftly
through the house, stopping only to slide on his shoes and grab his
baseball cap. He went out the door as he heard his mother yelling about
the water in the bathroom floor. He hopped in his blazer and drove quickly
down the driveway, exhaling in relief that he had made it out.
Jason pulled up to see Mike already holding the bottle of Makers Mark in
the window and smiling. Mike grabbed his cigarettes and the bottle of
whiskey and jumped in Jason’s blazer and they were off. They both knew
better than drinking and driving but rationalized it by staying in the
country knowing that police officers were extremely rare in the area,
especially after 8 o’clock.
Two hours later the boys ended up
behind Saint Ivo church. The area was wooded and hardly anyone had any
reason to go behind it. The cemetery was quiet and made the perfect spot
to hide. Many nights had been spent there, laughing and talking about the
things that concern teenagers. Tonight was no exception.
Mike
passed the bottle to Jason wiping his lips from the shot he had just
taken. Jason brought the bottle up to his nose. He loved the smell of
bourbon. He turned the bottle up and took a large drink. As he brought the
bottle back down, he clenched his teeth and inhaled sharply. The bourbon
burned his throat and made his eyes water. The radio was playing “Hooch”
by Everything. Jason leaned back against the seat and broke the silence.
“What do ya think college is gonna be like?”
“Don’t know,
but all that really matters is that we are outta this place and away from
our parents.”
“Yeah, that does sound so good”, Jason muttered.
Both boys were drunk. The bottle was over half empty. The night was
still, the moon shown bright and the stars sparkled furiously above. The
fireflies were all around them and the dew-wet grass glittered brightly
across the cemetery. Suddenly Mike started to laugh out loud.
“Do
you remember that time that we were in the hay loft beating off and your
father nearly caught us. I have never put my clothes on so fast in all of
my life.”
Laughing, Jason said “yeah, and you were trying to run
and pull up your pants and fell over one of the bales and just about
dislocated your knee. That was hilarious man.”
The silence was back
and Jason began to wonder why Mike had been thinking of that, or the fact
that they were beating off together. Jason remembered how Mikes’ cock
looked. It was big, larger than his by at least two inches and curved to
the right when it was hard. Jason felt himself getting hard thinking about
Mikes’ cock. He looked over at his friend. Mike sat there with his hand
lying on his crotch nonchalantly. His other hand lay on the door with a
Marlboro smoking. He had a grin on his face as though he was thinking
about something humorous.
“Mike, why did you say that, about us
beating off and stuff?”
“Don’t know, just sitting here thinking how
long it had been since you and I had done that I guess. I think we did it
here last, in your mom’s Buick remember?”
Jason thought about it
and said, “Yeah I think it was.”
Silence returned until it was
broken with a most bizarre question from Mike.
“Jason you ever
wonder what it would be like to screw a man?”
Jason sat there,
hardly believing what his friend had just asked. His head started to spin
and his cock was pressing hard against his jeans. Jason could hardly
believe it when he heard himself say, “yeah I have wondered a few times,
why?”
“I guess I just liked it when you and me used to jerk off
together. I’m hard now thinkin’ bout it. I been thinking bout it lately,
must be the heat or somethin’. Don’t reckon I am a fag do ya?”
Jason thought about it and said “nah, I think about it too ya know. Mom
and dad won’t let me date girls so I gotta jerk off for relief, and I
think ‘bout you and me jerkin off back then.”
Silence returned. The
crickets sang loud and the pond frogs could be heard from the lake just
down the hill. A whipper will sing in the distance. Jason’s mind was
racing. The thought of seeing Mike jerk off again was quite exciting. In
the back of his mind he was afraid to be too eager, fearing that Mike
would notice and think he was gay or something.
Mike broke the
silence, “Think you’d like to suck on my dick? I’d suck yours if ya did.”
Jason thought that he would explode from the invitation. As calm and
cool a reaction as he could muster, he said, “yeah I guess so. What could
it hurt?”
With that Mike exhaled deeply and unzipped his pants. The
light from the radio put a green cast over the cab of the truck. There it
was. That cock that had so amazed him in the past. Tonight he would get to
do much more than watch, he would actually get to touch it. Jason watched
as Mike eased his Levi’s down to his knees and started to play with his
balls. Mike looked over at Jason who was watching intensely.
“Well
here it is. How ya wanna start?”
Jason’s eyes were locked on target
and he was so mesmerized by this turn of events that he nearly missed his
friend’s question. “Umm uh, guess I’ll come around there.”
With
that Jason took another drink from the bottle and opened the door. The
liquor made him dizzy as he started to walk around the truck. He heard
Mike open the door as he stumbled around the corner of the truck. Jason
was so eager that he quickly dropped to his knees by the side of the
truck. Mike slid around so that he was half standing and half leaning on
the seat. Jason could feel the dew on his knees. His head was spinning,
either from the excitement or the liquor, he couldn’t tell which. He put
his hands on Mikes’ legs to balance himself and he laughed nervously. He
could feel Mike’s warm skin and the hair on his leg. It was dark but Jason
had no trouble making out the huge member that hung in front of him.
Slowly, Jason brought his mouth to Mikes’ cock.
“Oh fuck yeah,
ummm, damn” Mike hissed.
Jason had never done this before and was a
little nervous that he may not do it right. Mike’s noises urged him on
though. They didn’t sound like noises that pain caused. Jason slid the
cock into his mouth as far as it would go, and there were still two inches
that would not fit. Mike looked down as his best friend gave him head. He
gently brought his hand down and turned Jason’s baseball cap around
backwards and then rested his hand at the base of Jason’s neck. He started
to rock his hips rhythmically with the song by All Saints “never ever”
that was playing on the radio. Jason caught the hint and started to pull
back on Mike’s rod only to slowly swallow it again.
Jason could
smell Mike’s crotch. He could smell the soap that he had showered with
earlier mixed with the musky scent of manhood. All of this mixed with the
stout smell of bourbon. Jason closed his eyes as he savored the taste of
his friend. Mike’s pace quickened as a new song started on the radio.
Jason’s jaws were starting to ache but he had no intention of stopping.
Suddenly, Jason felt something hit the back of his throat. It was cum.
Mike had shot his load in his mouth. He had not even thought that far in
advance and was not prepared to take the load. Mike’s cum was salty, thick
and creamy. Jason’s eyes watered as he pulled off Mike’s cock and
swallowed furiously as some of the hot liquid ran down his chin. Jason sat
back on his haunches and looked up at his friend who had shed his shirt
and was looking down at him with the look of intense satisfaction. “Man
that was totally fucking cool,” Mike said with a gasp.
The moon was
glaring off Mike’s chest and wet cock. Jason wiped his mouth off and said
“man you could have warned me that you were gonna shoot. You ‘bout fucking
killed me.”
Both boys laughed. Jason got up from the grass and
reached around Mike and grabbed the bottle of bourbon that was lying in
the seat of the truck and took a drink. “Sorry man, it just felt so good,
I got caught up in it and I was cumming fore I knew it.”
Jason
looked at Mike with a smile and said “no prob, we’ll just see how you like
it.”
“Nah man I don’t think I could do it, what was it like?”
“It wasn’t that bad, kinda cool actually” Jason chided, hoping his
friend would not chicken out.
“Ok then how ya want yours?”
With that, Jason hopped up in the seat of the blazer and laid back in the
seat. He reached down and unzipped his jeans and pulled his semi-hard cock
out. “Suck it” he said with grin.
Mike turned and pulled up his
pants. He leaned into the truck and took Jason’s cock into his mouth. Mike
could feel the cock brush the back of his throat, making his eyes water.
He replicated the moves that Jason had made, for this was his first cock
as well. Jason hissed and inhaled deeply. Jason was so excited by his best
friend giving him head that he barely lasted a minute. He shot his load
into Mike’s mouth. Afterwards, Mike stood up and wiped his mouth off and
gave his friend a big smile and said jokingly, “damn man that was damn
near a rim shot.”
“Well it ain’t every day that such a good
cocksucker comes along.”
With that Mike reached up and thumped the
brim of his hat and said, “Fuck ya, bitch”. Mike grabbed the bottle and
washed down Jason’s juice. “It’s a damn shame that we just now started
doing this. Hell we coulda been sucking each other off since we were
twelve.”
“Yeah I know, damn, look at what time it is, my mom and
dad are gonna kill me, I gotta get up and milk in the morning. We better
get outta here.” Jason said.
With that, both boys jumped in the
blazer. Jason drove around the church and dropped Mike off at his truck
and headed towards home. The feeling of what had just happened between he
and Mike was exciting. He could feel the effects of the alcohol and he
wondered what things would be like the next time that he and Mike were
together. Was it the alcohol that made them do it? Would it happen again?
Would Mike be all freaked out and stuff?
Jason pulled up in the
driveway and sure enough his parent’s bedroom light was on. “Damn” he
mumbled to himself glancing at the clock. 1:03. He slid his shirt on and
stumbled to the house. He unlocked the door and went inside. He heard his
mother say “I hope that you are not planning to sleep in tomorrow.” He
rolled his eyes and said “no mother.” He kicked off his shoes and went up
the stairs and plopped down on his bed. Visions of the blowjob he had just
given raced through his mind. Could he be gay himself? Well if he was,
then so was Mike. He closed his eyes and drifted into sleep, his stomach
fluttering with the recent memory the night’s deed. The next thing Jason
knew, the alarm was blaring. Could it be 5:30 already? He sat up in the
bed, still drunk. Was it a dream or had he really blown his best friend
the night before. He put his hand on his chin and sure enough, there was
dried cum there. He smiled and climbed out of the bed.
The next day
Jason felt like a new person. The sun was shining bright while he went
about his daily chores. He ran last nights events through his mind over
and over and it seemed to get hotter each time it was replayed. Jason took
a break from patching the fence and looked out across pasture. In the
distance, he could see the silos of Mike’s farm. Jason wondered to himself
what Mike was thinking about. Did he enjoy what had happened last night?
Would he want to do it again? Jason’s concentration was broken as his
father spoke aloud. “What the hell are you doing?”
“Just taking a
break” Jason stammered.
“Well ya need to git yer ass in gear, guess
ya think that the damned hole in the fence is gonna fix itself?”
“Yeah, yeah dad, I’m doing it,” Jason said rolling his eyes as he turned
his back to his father.
Jason wondered what the hell his father was
doing. Today was Saturday and he knew that his father always went to the
stockyards with his brother. Well Jason really did not care, these past
few weeks, his father’s attitude was nearly more than he could bare. Thank
God that he would soon be moving off to school and would have at least
some relief. Jason looked up and saw two blue birds chattering in the tree
above. He stood there for a moment, watching the leaves dancing in the
wind. In the distance he heard a cow bawl. He looked at his watch and
realized that it would soon be milking time again. He finished up the
fence and wondered off toward the barn.
Jason went about the
mundane chores of the barn as usual, expecting to spend the next two hours
listening to the radio and talking to the cows. Little did he know that he
was about to be paid a visit. Mike was on his way there.
Jason
grabbed the milker and threw the hose over his shoulder so that it would
not touch the ground and walked between two of the black and white cows
and squatted down to fit the milker on the cow. Something caught his eye
and as he looked under the cows’ stomach, he could see a pair of black
rubber boots, covered in mud, coming through the milk room and into the
parlor. At first Jason feared that it was his father, but he soon realized
that the walk was different. Jason immediately stood up and stepped out
from between the cows only to run into Mike’s chest. Both boys jumped, not
expecting each other to be there. “Damn, ya little short shit!” Mike
laughed. “Ya gotta grow a little so a feller can see ya standing tween
them cows and ya don’t scare the hell out of ‘em .”
“Piss off ya
fucker,” Jason retorted “What the hell are ya doing here anyway?”
“Talked ma sister inta milking tonight so I could come see what you was
doing.”
“Same ol shit, milking the fuckin cows.” Jason’s mind was
roaring with questions. Mike hadn’t been here while he was milking in some
time, like three years. Why did he come? What was on his mind? He wanted
to know the answers to his questions but knew that he could not ask. What
if Mike found out how much he enjoyed what they had done the night before.
No, he could not risk that. He would play it as cool as he could and let
Mike explain. If he would. “What did ya have ta give yer sister to git ‘er
ta milk for ya?” Jason asked.
“Aw, I gave her twenty bucks, and I
promised not ta squeal on ‘er cause her and her boyfriend was making out
at the end of the driveway last night, she really is a slut, ya know?”
Mike laughed.
Jason heard the suction break on a milker and turned
to fix it. He reached under the cow and pulled a teat cup off then raised
up and smiled at Mike and said “don’t reckon she’s much different than her
slut brother.”
“Yeah, shut up bitch.” Mike said as he flicked the
rim of Jasons’ cap. “So whatcha doing tonight after ya git done here?”
“Nothing I don’t reckon, I was gonna call ya later and see what you
were gonna do, but I guess since ya here now there probably ain’t no need
in it now,” Jason laughed. “Ya got any ideas?”
“Well we still got
the rest of that that Makers ta finish, and I found this in ma room this
mornin.” With that Mike pulled out a half of a pint of Jim Beam from the
crotch of his dirty blue jeans. He shook it in a circular manner so that
the brown liquid sloshed inside the bottle.
Jason’s eyes had stayed
a bit longer on Mike’s crotch than normal, and Mike noticed. Jason raised
his eyes to the bottle and then to Mikes’ face, which was covered with an
almost sinful smile. Jason realized that he had been caught in the act,
and returned Mike’s smile. As the two boys stood there, only inches away
from one another, the sexual tension started to build. They both felt it,
and Mike broke the awkward but enjoyable moment. “Ya sucked ma dick good
last night man.” Jason watched as Mike reached down and grabbed the
growing bulge in his pants.
“Uhhh, thanks.” Jason stuttered, almost
in shock as to what his friend had said. Nervously, Jason turned to take
the milker off the cow that he was standing behind. As he squatted down
beside the cow, Mike walked a bit closer and smiled his devilish smile and
said “that don’t mean ya gotta drop to yer knees little man.”
“Yeah, fuck you too bitch.” Jason laughed, his face blushing.
“Well
I need ta go, told pop that I would run by the store and git some of that
calf feed for em. Meet me at the church tonight around nine, ok?” Mike
turned and walked toward the milkroom door.
“OK, I’ll be there
dude. Later!”
“Later!”
Jason’s mind raced to the point that
he thought that he may have to sit down. Of all the reactions that he had
expected from Mike, that was the least suspected. He thought about Mike’s
hardon and how exciting it was to see it in the daylight. Jason continued
with his chores, only they had a much more enjoyable tone. There was the
feeling of anticipation and Jason could hardly wait to see Mike tonight.
The butterflies in his stomach were making his head dizzy, yet he knew
that there was not a more pleasurable feeling on this earth, than the one
he felt at this moment. For some reason, he started to wonder if this
feeling in his stomach was love. He had known Mike for some time and he
had always enjoyed his company. He had even looked forward to the time
they spent together, but this was different and he knew it.
The
truth be known, this was just an eighteen-year-old guy, yearning for sex
with another guy. Jason cared for Mike, but a long lasting relationship
was unfathomed. Jason had no clue as to what he felt. Even though he
suspected love, he knew deep down that this was more along the lines of
lust. Somehow, thinking of these feelings as love helped make them easier
to take. These were totally new sensations for Jason. He had never felt
this kind of passion for anything.
Jason took the milker off of the
last cow and followed her to the door. The cow slowed as she started down
the ramp leading into pasture that adjoined the barn. Jason had his hand
on the cow’s hip and he could feel the heat emanating from her body. The
hair of her coat was smooth and shiny. Jason stood at the door of the barn
and watched the cow pick her steps through the mud. He looked up and the
stars were already beginning to shine. The moon had risen and it’s glow
illuminated the white spots of the cows that stood in the night air. The
dew had fallen and once again the grass was shining. In the distance,
there was a dog barking. From this vantage point, not a single man-made
light could be seen. Only the lights from the barn shown through the
field, giving those shadows that are morbidly out of proportion. Jason
looked at his shadow and it looked as though he were at least fourteen
feet tall. He laughed to himself, he knew that he was way shorter than
that. He turned and walked into the milk room. He looked at the clock on
the wall. A quarter ‘til eight. Soon it would be time to meet Mike. His
stomach fluttered at the very thought of it. Jason hurried through the
rest of his chores and hurried to the house to get ready for his night.
As Jason neared the house, he could hear the radio going in the shed.
He knew that his father was there. He walked by as quietly as he could. He
did not want to get detained by some speech of hard work and a honest
living. God knows he was sick of hearing that shit. He trotted across the
yard and stepped onto the porch. He paused to scratch the dog’s neck and
then went into the house. “Hey mom!” Jason said in a most chipper mood.
“Well who lit a fire under your ass?” His mom looked at him with a
smile on her face.
“Nobody, just in a good mood I reckon. Is there
something wrong with that?”
“No I don’t reckon. Where’re ya going
tonight? You remember that we’re going to your grandma’s tomorrow? Don’t
be out all hours of the night. Like last night. I swear, you boys can
waste more time doing nothing than any two I’ve seen.”
Jason turned
his back to his mother and smiled, thinking to himself that if she only
knew how they had passed the time last night. “Yeah I won’t be.”
Jason kicked off his shoes and bounded up the stairs. He noticed that his
mother had picked the clothes up out of the chair and folded them. And
made his bed. He walked to the stack of clothes, snatched some items from
it, knocking them over on the bed. He did not even turn on the radio. He
had to be ready soon, no time for that now. He went down the stairs and
into the bathroom and shut the door. As he stood in the shower, the hot
water hitting his face, his stomach fluttered again. He could hardly wait.
He hurried through his shower and got dressed. He kissed his mother on the
cheek as he left and said “don’t wait up!”
Jason rounded the curve
and there was Mike, waiting for him. Jason pulled up and Mike jumped in,
with two bottles of whiskey. Their night had begun.
A couple of
hours later, Mike had started to drive. They had both drank a generous
amount, Jason more so than Mike. The night had went as usual, they drank,
listened to music and talked about the usual stuff. Mike turned down the
road and Jason’s heart jumped. They were headed back toward the church.
Would it happen again tonight? God he hoped so. The conversation had
tapered off. It seemed they both knew what needed to happen next. Jason
watched as they approached the church but was surprised as they passed it
by. “Where we going?” Jason asked.
“Aw I figured we’d run down to
that farm pop bought. It’s down there on that dead end road. Not much
traffic ya know.” Jason looked at Mike’s face and could see him wink at
him and smile. Yes! Jason thought. The place was not far, but both boys
rode in silence. Mike pulled the stick back and the green 4x4 light glowed
on the dash. Jason could hear the mud splash and the road was quite rough.
The boys pulled up to an old barn. Even if there was traffic on the road,
they could not be seen. Mike turned the truck off and lit a cigarette and
guzzled the last of the Jim Beam. Jason looked forward, the anticipation
was more than he could stand, yet he kept his cool. Jason turned up the
Makers Mark bottle and took a drink. The whiskey stung his throat and his
eyes started to water.
“Well here we are.” Mike said as he exhaled.
“Whatcha wanna do now?”
“Don’t know, whatcha got in mind?” Jason
asked as he smiled at his friend, fully expecting his friend to ask for a
blowjob.
“I wanna fuck you.” Mike said, staring intently at Jason.
“Gee man I ain’t sure I can do that, sounds kinda painful.”
“Aw
c’mon. It won’t hurt. I’ll be real gentle.”
“Yeah well it ain’t
that I’m worried about, yer dick is big man.”
“It ain’t that big.
Sides, I know that you’d like it.”
Reluctantly, Jason gave in,
fearing the pain that he was sure to experience. Both boys got out of the
truck and Mike grabbed a blanket from behind the seat. He spread it out on
the ground and started to undress. Jason followed his lead. The moon was
shining bright and Jason could see the glare of it on Mike’s shoulders.
Jason slid his soccer shorts off and stood there watching Mike, who was
now totally naked, sitting on the ground and stroking his cock. Mike
motioned Jason to sit. Jason lowered himself to his knees and looked Mike
in the face, half with anticipation and half with fear. Mike said “what’s
wrong man? Told you there ain’t nothing to worry bout.”
“That’s
easy for you ta say, you ain’t about ta have a dick shoved in yer ass.”
Jason laughed nervously.
“C’mon, turn around here and let me crack
that ass for ya.” With that, Jason turned and put his back to Mike and
stood on his hands and knees. He could hear Mike spitting on his dick. He
himself had a raging hardon that ached. Mike spit in his hand and started
rubbing Jason’s ass. Chills ran up his spine and Mike felt Jason shutter
with sheer ecstasy. Slowly, Mike inserted his finger into Jason while he
massaged his cock with his other hand. The sensation almost drove Mike to
orgasm right there. The tightness and heat was incredible. He had been
with several girls and none of them were ever this tight or hot. Jason
closed his eyes and clinched his teeth. Mike’s finger felt like it was as
big around as a baseball bat. His mind raced as he thought that if this
was just his finger, what would his dick be like. Jason started to sweat,
both from the heat of the moment and the whiskey. His head was spinning
and he had to keep reminding himself that this was not a dream. Mike too,
had started to sweat. He could hardly wait to fuck his best friend. The
thought of it nearly made him nut on the spot. After what seemed hours,
Mike said “ya ready man?”
“Ready as I’m gonna be” Jason said in a
shaky voice. He heard Mike spitting in his hand again and felt the wetness
on his ass. He heard the spit on Mike’s cock pop and crackle as he readied
himself to penetrate. Mike was on his knees and he moved closer to Jason
and held his dick straight out and pressed it against Jason’s ass. Jason
dug his hands into the grass and stiffened his back to accommodate his
friends’ wishes. Mike felt Jason’s heat on his cockhead and an instant
smile came across his face. The first sensation of Mike’s cock entering
his ass were wonderful. The pain soon followed. Jason moaned, half in
ecstasy and half in pain. “Fuck man that fuckin hurts!” Jason said in a
strained voice. Mike heard the words but was now obsessed with burying his
cock as deep in Jason as he possibly could. Mike let go of his cock and
grabbed Jasons’ narrow hips and began to push his cock in deeper. Jason
squirmed and writhed under his friends’ onslaught but never once tried to
pull away. Mike grabbed Jason’s’ shoulders and pushed the last few inches
of his cock into his assaulted ass. Jason felt Mike’s pubic hair and his
hips press against his ass, he knew that finally he had taken it all. The
pain was so intense that he could hardly stand it. He did not want to pull
away, yet he was afraid to move. He started to doubt that this was as
enjoyable as he had once thought. The two boys were motionless for some
time and Mike broke the silence when he said “damn yer ass if fuckin
tight!”
“Yer dick is fuckin big as hell! I ain’t sure I can do this
man.” Jason said in meek voice.
“Yer doing fine man. An ass this
good, won’t take me long at all.”
Mike began to pull his cock out
and then to gently push it back in. By this time, Jason had loosened up
some and it began to get more and more pleasurable. In a matter of
seconds, the sensation of having a cock in his ass was the best he ever
imagined. Mike increased the pace as the two let out the sounds of sex.
Grunts and moans filled the night air. Jason knew that Mike was getting
close by his breathing. He remembered when they used to jack off and how
his breath was always a sure indicator that he was about to blow.
Suddenly, Mike let out a growl that must have come from his toes. He
grabbed Jason’s shoulders and thrust his cock so deep into Jason that he
nearly knocked his arms out from under them. Mike leaned down on top of
Jason and wrapped his arms around his chest. Jason could feel Mike’s
breath on the back of his neck and Mike squeezed his chest so hard that it
was difficult to draw in the deep breaths that they both needed. Jason
could feel Mike’s cock spasm inside his ass and he could feel Mike’s
sweaty chest on his back. The two remained in this position for several
minutes. Mike finally stood back up on his knees and sat back on his
haunches, pulling Jason back with him never pulling an inch of his cock
from Jason’s ass. Jason immediately began to beat off. He could feel the
tingling of his battered ass and as the thought of Mike’s cock still
tucked in his ass crossed his mind, he shot his load. Mike had his arms
around Jason’s stomach and his head on Jason’s shoulder watching his
friend jerk off. Mike felt Jason’s ass tense as he started to cum. A smile
came across Mike’s face, one of satisfaction. He was afraid at first that
he would hurt his best friend and that this would be the only time he
would enjoy this. He realized now that Jason had enjoyed this immensely
and that made him feel good. His friend had given him his ass and he had
returned the favor by giving back lots of pleasure.
After a while
the two pulled apart and lay on their back looking at the stars. They
talked about college and cars and chores. They drank more whiskey and they
laughed as they put their clothes back on. They did not talk about what
had happened. Neither of them needed to. They had both wanted it to happen
and they were glad that it did. They felt closer to one another now than
they ever had.
Jason dropped Mike off at his car at Saint Ivo and
drove down the road toward his house. The events of the evening flashed
through his mind and he could not help but smile. Jason reached down and
turned the radio up. He was driving a bit faster than he should have. When
he glanced back to the road, there was an animal there, a big one. Jason
swerved to miss the animal and everything went black. What seemed like
hours later, someone was slapping his face. In a drunken stupor he looked
up to see Jacob, his friend standing there. “What happened?” Jason asked
in a pained voice.
“Man ya fucked up about five of yer dads fence
posts.” Jacob said in worried tone of voice. “Yer dad is gonna crucify
you!”
Jason climbed out of his truck and walked around the front of
it. He could not believe his eyes. In the light of the headlights, Jacob
noticed the huge gash in Jason’s forehead. “Man you are for real bleeding
like a stuck hog.” Jacob adjusted Jason’s head to get a better view. Jason
was in disbelief, his parents would not only crucify him...they would burn
the corpse as well...
Thanks to Jacobs’ help, all of the alcohol
bottles got disposed of and the rest of the night was a blur. Jason rolled
over and looked at the alarm clock. 8:15, his parents had not awakened him
to milk the cows. As he raised his hand up, he felt a sharp pain race
through his whole body. This topped off with a hangover; this was going to
be a shitty day...completely shitty.
Jason finally rolled out of
bed and limped down the stairs and to the bathroom to have a closer look
at his injuries. It was much worse than he had imagined. There was a deep
gash cut in his forehead, both eyes were black and there were several
other scratches around his face. His entire body ached. There was a large
cut on his left knee and his ankle was really swollen. Damn, he thought to
himself, how in the hell is one supposed to function this way?
Jason walked to the front door and saw his blazer sitting by the garage
and decided he should go have a look at the damage, hopefully it was not
that bad.
As he was inspecting the damage, Mike pulled up in his
car. “Damn!
You fucked that one up good”
“I guess.” Jason
said squinting at the morning sun. “Least it ain’t totaled though” “Well
your fuckin face is. Dude you look like somebody beat the shit out of you”
Mike said with a laugh.
“And I feel like it too.”
“Looks
like I was just too much for ya last night huh? Gotcha all excited and
look at what ya did.” Mike laughed. “Fuck ya! Asshole. It was that damned
whiskey of yours. Got me drunk as shit! Jason glanced at Mike to see his
killer smile and then he winked at him.
After a brief description
of the prior night’s events, Mike said that he needed to get going, his
dad would be expecting him back soon. Jason waved goodbye and limped to
the front porch and sat down on the porch swing. A million things were
rushing through his head at once. He was surprised to hear Mike talk so
openly about their sexual activities, but he was excited none the less. He
thought to himself about all of the girls that just swooned over Mike and
laughed to himself as he thought about their reaction if they were to find
out who Mike had decided to fuck instead of them.
Jason looked out
over the hayfield. He marveled at the barn and it’s sharp red contrast to
the green trees and grass that surrounded it. The sun was shining bright
and the sky was a beautiful blue and there was not a cloud in sight. Jason
glanced at the garage and noticed that his mom’s car was gone, guess they
had already left for his grandmothers. Thank god he thought to himself,
after what had happened there was no way that he could have handled seeing
his extended family. Lady, Jason’s dog came up on the porch and hopped
into the swing beside him. Painfully he threw his arm around the dog and
sat watching the day. There was a slight breeze blowing from the south and
he could here the buzz of the bees coming from the newly planted flowers
that lined the front walk. It was truly a beautiful day.
A couple
of weeks later, Jason’s wounds had healed and he had paid to have his
blazer fixed from the money in his savings account. He was just finishing
up the milking chores when Jacob pulled up. “Hey guy, what’s up?” Jacob
called out.
“Not much, just finishing up. What are ya doing?”
“Well I just talked to Mike. He wanted to meet up to the church. I
told him that I was going out with Jennifer tonight, but I told him that I
would run by here and tell ya to meet ‘em up there about eight.” “All
right, guess I’ll run up there. You gonna come later after ya through with
Jennifer?”
“Well I don’t expect to be done that soon if ya get my
drift.” Jacob said with a smile. “Might drive by your place though and see
if you rearranged anymore fence.”
“Well I’ll try not...catch ya
later dude.”
“Later.” Jacob climbed in his truck and drove down the
lane. Jason wondered why Mike did not come himself, but he figured that he
was busy or something. His stomach fluttered at the thought of being with
Mike again. He hurried and finished the chores, eight would be here before
you know it.
The night was warm and made warmer by the liquor. Once
again, Jason and Mike sat in the graveyard at St Ivo. There had been no
mention of sex, nor any move made. Jason was waiting on Mike’s move. The
two boys sat in the truck for what seemed like forever before Mike spoke.
“You think Jacob has ever fucked round with another guy?” “Don’t know.
Never thought about it actually (which is a lie, I though about it a lot).
Why?”
“Don’t know, just think he’s got a good looking ass, bet it
might be as tight as yours.”
“Well, you know he did spend a lot of
time with that guy Brian. People is always saying that he is a fag. You
don’t reckon they think we are fags do ya?”
“Hell no. We don’t run
around actin like girls and shit. We just like fuckin, and it just happens
that we fuck each other and that we are guys. That don’t make us queers.”
The words hit Jason hard. That one issue had been stuck on his mind
for some time. Was he gay or was he just fucking? He wanted to agree with
Mike but something in his heart said that he was gay. Jason’s thoughts
were interrupted as Mike took off his shirt. Mike looked over and smiled
at Jason and said, “Speaking of fuckin, you wanna have some fun?” The
moment Jason had been waiting for. He looked at Mike with a grin and said,
“I thought that you would never ask” in his best high pitched voice. The
two guys laughed and Mike opened his door and ran over to his car. Jason
watched intently as Mike returned to the truck with something in his
hands. “Whatcha got there man?”
“Just something to make this easier
on us,” Mike said as he took another drink of the whiskey. “ I got some
Vaseline and a blanket. I tore the fuck out of my knees last time, need
some padding this time.” Mike laughed and hopped over the back seat.
Jason heard him spreading the blanket on the floor and he reached over
and grabbed the bottle and took a rather large drink. His eyes watered and
his throat stung and he shook his head to fight off the convulsions. He
thought to himself that he was going to need this as he remembered the
pain of the last assault Mike performed on his ass. He put the cap back on
the bottle and climbed over the seat. As he dropped behind the second row
of seats, he felt Mike’s smooth chest that was reclined against the side
of the truck. Mike then stood suddenly and reached over the seat and
grabbed the bottle of whiskey. He looked at Jason and said, “We might need
this.”
Jason stood on his knees and took off his shirt. Mike
reached out and playfully pinched his nipple. Jason unzipped his pants and
started to slide them down over his ass. Mike did the same and Jason
glanced over and saw that Mike was not wearing any underwear and he
thought to himself how convenient. Jason rolled over and sat down and
pulled his shorts off his feet. Mike had already taken his shorts off and
as Jason sat down, Mike climbed in between his legs and looked into his
eyes. “I’m gonna fuck you like my bitch tonight.” Mike then bent down and
started to lick Jason’s chest. Though it was hot, the night breeze felt
very cool on the wetness of Jason’s chest.
After a bit, Mike took
Jason by the knees and pulled his head away from the back of the seat.
Jason’s athletic flexibility allowed his knees to flex all the way up to
his shoulders. He looked out the back glass and saw the stars shining and
he heard the crickets chirping and a whip-or-wil sing in the trees. He
looked into Mike’s face. There was his charismatic smile. Jason thought
that that smile would get him anything. He saw the sweat forming on his
Mike’s forehead and he smelled the whiskey on his breath. He saw Mike
reach over and take some Vaseline out of the can and he felt the coolness
as Mike spread it across his asshole. He felt Mike’s big finger slowly
start to slide into his ass. Jason closed his eyes and bit his bottom lip.
Mike added another finger to loosen his friend up and then added another.
Jason moaned slightly as Mike slid his fingers in and out. He could hear
the Vaseline pop and crackle as Mike stroked his pulsing cock. Mike looked
at Jason’s face and asked “are you ready big man?”
“Ready as I’ll
ever be I reckon.” Jason laughed out loud as he said in fake whimpering
voice, “be gentle.”
Mike smiled and pushed Jason’s legs up further,
giving himself an easy shot at his ass. He pushed the head of his cock
against Jason’s tight ass and inhaled. He started to invade and he felt
Jason tense up. Jason prepared himself and he felt he ass stretch as Mike
started into him. It seemed like forever but finally, Mike’s cock was
buried in his ass. God, it seemed to have grown since the last time.
Jason’s rapid breathing turned into a low moan as Mike started to pull
gently out.
“You OK man?”
“Yeah, just takes some getting used
to that’s all.”
Mike started to move in and out. “Fuck man, your
ass is so tight! I could go right now.” Mike held out for as long as he
could, but finally he blew his load and collapsed on Jason. There they
lay, chest to chest then Mike slid his arms under Jason’s back and
squeezed him gently. Jason lay there, feeling so complete under the weight
of his best friend. His heart was racing at the tender moment that he and
his friend was having. He could here Mike’s shallow breathing and he could
feel Mike’s heart pounding against his own chest. He could feel Mikes cock
getting soft inside him. Mike started to stir and sat up. “Your turn man”,
Mike said as he reached down and took Jason’s dick in his hand. Without
pulling his cock from Jason’s ass, he stroked his cock up and down. By
now, Jason was so turned on that it took only seconds for him to shoot.
Slowly, Mike slid his cock out and sat back against the side of the truck.
He laid his head back on against the window and closed his eyes. Jason
looked at Mike’s body that was shining in the moonlight. His legs were so
long and muscular. His chest shimmered with sweat and he could see it
gently rise and fall. His cock was laying to the left and his dark hair
covered his balls to the point that they were unable to be seen. From this
view, Mike’s hands and feet looked massive. Mike was tall and wore at
least a size 13 in shoes. Mike’s hands were big, his fingers were thick
and they were slightly callused. They intrigued Jason as he had always had
a thing for hands and feet. Jason lowered his legs and began filtering
through Mike’s pants to find his cigarettes. He pulled one out and lit it.
He took a draw and passed it to Mike. “Damn that was good”, Jason said
with a smile.
“You ain’t tellin me nothing I don’t already know.
Got Vaseline all over me though. Damn it’s two o’clock already? Shit I
gotta get going.” Mike reached over and unlatched the door and hopped out
the back. He stood gently on the gravel. Jason could see his limp dick
flop in the moonlight as he pulled his shorts up. Mike did not put on his
shirt or his socks, he just slid his shoes on. He smacked Jason’s foot and
said “I’ll catch ya later man.”
Jason said “later man” as Mike
walked away. Jason was confused as to why Mike had left so quickly. He
figured that it had something to do with that little show of emotion that
they had shared. He watched Mike drive off and then looked down at the cum
that was still sparkling on his hairless chest. He then picked up the
bottle of Makers Mark and held it up to see how much was left in the
bottle. He turned the bottle up and took another large drink as he used
his T-shirt to wipe off his chest. He then slid into his jeans and slid
out the back of the truck. The air was cooler and the stars were still
shining bright. He closed the door of the blazer and turned the bottle up
and finished the last of it. He tossed the bottle into the trees and
climbed in the front seat of the truck. He paused for a moment and sniffed
the air, he could still smell Mike.
His cock started to get hard
again. He started the truck and started home, very cautiously this time.
The alarm clock was blaring as Jason rolled over and saw the time.
“Four o’clock, God!” He said in a really aggravated voice. Jason sat on
the side of the bed in an attempt wake himself for his morning chores. As
bad as he felt, this was his favorite time of morning. Everything was so
relaxed and peaceful.
Jason decided that he would walk to the barn.
The gentle morning breeze felt good on his skin. The morning smelled of
rain. There was no light, other than the moon and the stars. Jason gazed
up at them as he hummed a Garth Brooks song. He thought to himself that he
would soon be away from all of this. While he was excited to leave the
farm, he was saddened at the same time. There may be no other times that
he would feel this peacefulness. Jason reached down and patted his dog on
the head and whistled so he would go off and start to get the cows up.
Jason stood and watched the black and white dog disappear under the fence
a little ways off. Then he started toward the dairy barn.
The door
swung open and Jason walked in. He froze in his tracks as he heard a
voice. At four in the morning, the last noise he expected in the barn was
a human voice. His heart started to race, the voice was a mans’, and he
was speaking in Spanish. Jason remembered that his dad and brother had
hired some Mexicans to help with the tobacco but he had not anticipated
that they would be in the barn.
Trying to ignore them Jason turned
on the lights to the barn and began to assemble the milkers. He heard the
dog barking and the familiar popping of the mud as the cows entered the
holding pen. Jason walked out of the milk room to go open the parlor door
to let the cows in and ran right into someone. A little startled, Jason
jumped backwards only to see the man standing in his path. “Hola” the man
said.
Jason having the benefit of Spanish in his sophomore year of
high school responded with “hello, how ya doing?”
“Fine” the young
man said with a deep accent. He smiled and walked into the milk room.
Jason stood there with his mouth gaping open. The guy was so very
attractive. He was tall with a broad chest and beautiful smile. Jason was
snapped back to reality as two other Mexican men passed him. He did not
see what they looked like; he was simply amazed at the beauty of the first
man. Jason shook his head and went on with the morning chores, all the
time thinking of the beautiful Hispanic man that he had run into earlier
that morning.
“Jason! Come on and eat!”
“Yes mother! I’m
coming!” Jason said with snarl while rolling his eyes. Jason came down the
stairs and found his mother standing at the door.
“We are going
down to the bottoms to start with that tobacco. Your dad said that you
should get to painting the milk room. He left a check there on the table
for you to run into town and pick it up Anderson’s.” “Yes mother. I’ll do
it.” Jason said rolling his eyes again as he stuffed a sausage biscuit in
his mouth. His mom left and Jason decided to catch some cartoons before he
started into town. As he plopped down in to the chair and flipped on the
television, the phone rang.
“Hey guy!” Came Mike’s voice.
“Hey man! What’s up?” Jason asked.
“Not much. Just waiting for dad
to come back with the tractor so we can go cut tobacco. What are you going
to do tonight?”
“Not sure for real. Figured that I might hang out
some. You gonna be up at the church?”
“Don’t think so, I gotta date
with Wendy.” That statement hit Jason like a brick. Mike had a date with a
girl! He was enraged with jealousy. How the hell could he do that?
“Hey man that is pretty cool. How did you arrange that?” Jason asked
superficially.
“Well you know that her brother and my sister are
dating. She hooked me up.
So if I am lucky, I might be kinda late.”
Mike laughed.
“Well if ya get back early, stop by the church, I
will be around there somewhere I guess.”
“All right man, I might
see ya later then. Have a good one.”
Jason could not believe that.
As he sat in front of the television he sorted through his feelings. Wendy
he laughed to himself. He thought that if she had known what Mike and he
had done, she would want nothing to do with him. He was jealous, but
satisfied that he had sex with Mike before she could, and that made him
feel proud. Jason put the thoughts out of his head as he watched a bug’s
bunny cartoon. Jason started to rub his crotch. One of his most enjoyable
things was to masturbate in the house, somewhere other than his bedroom.
The experience was rare as his mother or his sister were always there, not
today, not now. His petting became heavier and his hands explored his
young body. He shed his t-shirt. Jason pulled out his erection and started
to masturbate, unaware that he was being watched. The chair that he was
sitting in was sitting next to a window. In the height of his arousal,
Jason glanced toward the window only to see a figure staring in at him. He
started screaming and the figure took off running across the porch. Jason
ran out onto the porch but there was no one to be found. Jason ran around
to the back of the house, but still there was no one. A little panic
stricken, Jason stood there wondering who the hell the person could have
been. Whoever it was, they sure got an eye full. His stomach sank as he
hoped that it had not been any of his sister’s children. God he would
never be able to show his face again. A little shaken, Jason grabbed his
shirt and buttoned his shorts. He jumped in his newly restored blazer and
headed into town.
The breeze that blew through the truck was warm.
The day was hot and humid. The kind of day that you sweat no matter if you
do nothing. Looking out on the fields Jason could see the heat rising off
of them. The fields have started to turn brown and yellow from the
summer’s heat. The black plank fences were contrasted by the red gates.
The big farmhouses and red and black barns dotted the landscape. Indeed
there were more cows in this part of the country than there were people.
It was too warm for animals to be out. There were a few birds singing and
you could hear a tractor in the distance. Jason had never liked going into
town. It smelled funny and the people were not as friendly. There was
traffic and it seemed that they never rested. Even those kids that were
his age seemed somehow different. It was always a huge relief to get back
to the country.
Jason pulled onto a dirt road that led to the
tobacco patch were his parents were working. As he popped over the hill he
could see his brother’s truck as well as his parents’ truck. He looked out
across the field of green tobacco and he could see them slowing cutting
their way through the patch. Jason bounced across the ditch and parked his
truck. Everyone in the patch was looking at him, as it was a very uncommon
sight to see Jason in the tobacco patch, it was no great secret how much
he despised it. “Hey dad, Steve sent this to you, he said that you ordered
it or something.” Jason yelled.
“Well what the hell is it?” Jason’s
dad yelled.
“Some piece for the plowing tractor or something, he
didn’t say.”
“Well put it in the front seat of the truck and I will
look at it later.
Did you get the walls painted in the barn?”
“No dad, I stopped by here first cause it was on the way home. I will
get it done today though.” Jason rolled his eyes in disgust. He grabbed
the part out of the truck and headed for his fathers’ truck. As he neared
the truck he could see that one of the Mexican’s was sharpening his spear
as he sat in the shade. Jason peered closer and he could tell that it was
the nice looking one that he had literally run into this morning. He
opened the door of the truck and he noticed that the guy was sitting there
looking at him. Jason laid the part in the truck and shut the door and
grabbed a Pepsi out of the cooler. “My name is Jason, don’t believe I
caught yours this morning?”
“Si, mi llamo gustoph.” The guy
replied.
“Si, hablo espanol un pequito.”
“Oh I see” Gus said
in deep voice with a heavy accent. “I was late, sharpen knife,” he said
with a laugh and holding the tobacco knife toward him.
“Really?
Were have you been?” Jason replied, making conversation.
“Ah, your
home. “
“Really? You guys really scared me in the barn this
morning, I was not expecting anyone to be there.” Jason commented as he
squinted looking across the field.
“Si, you mother, she ask me to
mulch flowers by porch. I think I scare you again aye?” The man laughed.
Jason looked at him in sheer terror. My god it had been him in the window.
Jason was horrified. He stood there with his mouth hanging open while this
beautiful specimen glared at him with a smile across his face.
“Uh,
umm, shit! Look man sorry about that, I had no clue that anyone was
about.”
“Oh is no problem, you young and strong. There is no
problem, no one is to know.” As Gus stood up and flicked the bill of
Jason’s hat. And Jason knew he must be seeing things but he could have
sworn that Gus had rearranged his crotch and winked at him.
“Hey
thanks man.” Jason stuttered. Jason walked back to his truck. He was so
embarrassed that he could have dug a whole right there in the patch and
crawled in it. This god of a man had seen him beating off and then had
laughed in his face, called him young and may have even hit on him as a
joke. Jason was sure that all three of the Mexican hired help would be
poking fun at him now. Hopefully they would not tell any of his family.
Jason returned home and started to paint the walls of the cowshed. It
was a pretty easy job. There was a fan and a radio so the day passed
quickly. Around five Jason sent the dog after the cows and he started the
milking chores again. Afterward Jason went to the house. As he came in the
door he saw two of the Mexican help, Roy and Chico, were sitting at the
table with Jason’s dad and brother and brother in law. “God what a mix.”
Jason mumbled to himself. He quickly headed towards the stairs. He grabbed
some clothes and then headed for the shower. As Jason rounded the doorway,
once again he ran right into Gus’s chest. “Excuse me man.” Jason blurted
out without thinking.
“Cuse me, amigo.” It was not what Gus had
said, rather the way that he had touched Jason. Both hands on his hips
with a gentle squeeze and one of his custom smiles. Jason stumbled into
some flowerpot and into a chair. “You ok amigo?” Gus asked as he pulled
Jason up out of the chair. There they were standing, face-to-face. Jason
could feel Gus’s breath on his face and he could smell his cologne and
even the soap that he had washed with. Before Jason could control himself
his hands were on Gus’s hips as though they belonged there. Jason could do
nothing, he was caught in Gus’s gaze. Jason tried to back up but Gus
pulled him close again. Suddenly realizing that they were standing in the
hallway, Jason pulled off and rushed into the bathroom.
“What was
that about?” Jason asked himself in a low voice. Jason hurriedly showered.
As he dressed in his clean clothes, he wondered if Mike would show up at
the church. He had talked to Jacob earlier in the week and he said that he
would probably be there. Not thinking, Jason ran out of the house in the
darkness and walked toward his truck, only to find Gus standing there
leaning against it. “Hey Gus. What’s up?”
“Nuhcing amigo. Where you
go?”
“Oh I am going to meet some friends.”
“Come here, I
need to show you something”
“Cool, what is it?” Jason was totally
unprepared for what happened next.
He followed Gus around the tool
shed. Gus stopped and turned toward Jason. Suddenly Jason felt very
unnerved. His hands started to shake and voice was trembling. “What is it
that you wanted me to see Gus?” Without warning Gus grabbed Jason and
flung him to the ground. Jason tried to scramble to his feet but Gus was
too quick and was on top of him. For some reason he didn’t scream, and
truthfully he did not fight the onslaught as hard as he could have. Gus
put his knees on Jason ‘s shoulders and unzipped his pants. Suddenly Jason
had a big cock dangling against his face. With one thrust of Gus’s hips,
Jason’s mouth was filled with the cock. Jason stopped fighting altogether
and let Gus have his way. Jason’s eyes were watering and he was gagging as
the cock was forced down his throat.
The night was quiet. Jason
could hear the crickets in the grass and he could feel the coolness and
dampness of the dew against his back. He could hear Gus’s heavy breathing
and he could smell the fabric softener in Gus’s underwear. The moon and
stars were shining down on them and Jason could see the sweat glistening
on Gus’s face. As Jason lay there looking into Gus’s face, he noticed that
as Gus wiped the sweat from his brow, he was wearing a wedding band.
Suddenly Jason felt sick and started to struggle again. This guy had his
nerve, to be married and probably have children and then dare force his
cock in a guys’ mouth? No way! Jason tried to throw Gus off, but suddenly
Jason felt Gus’s fist strike his eye. Stunned from pain and just the fact
that this guy had enough balls to hit him, Jason settled down. Gus began
to moan and Jason could feel his throat fill with cum. Gus, breathing
shallow, stood up, zipped his pants up and walked off.
Jason rolled
over and started to spit out cum, coughing and gasping for air around the
thick fluid deposited in his throat. Wiping his face off, Jason got up off
the ground; he had somehow cut his leg. Gus was nowhere to be seen. Jason
limped to his truck and took off his t-shirt. It was stained and damp , so
Jason started to wipe the blood off his leg with it. He tilted the rear
view mirror and looked at his eye, it was already turning blue and
swelling. : Damn!” Jason said as he smacked the steering wheel. He started
the truck and drove away, all the time thinking about the encounter that
he just had with Gus. He was a mixture of being pissed off and turned on,
and a little afraid. He had not expected that to happen. Thinking back on
it, he was very vulnerable at that point and Gus was much bigger than he.
Jason thought about telling his parents of the encounter but then laughed.
He would not tell anyone about the degrading experience. He would just try
not to put himself in that position again. In two weeks, Jason would be
off to Saint Catharine College and he would not need to worry about Gus
anymore.
Jacob was waiting at the church as he said he would. Jason
pulled up in his blazer. He got out of the truck and walked toward Jacob’s
truck. Jacob could tell that he was really pissed about something. “Why
the hell ain’t you wearing a shirt?” Jacob asked with a laugh.
“You
don’t even want to know.” Jason said in a nasty tone.
“Dude you are
bleeding! What the hell happened to you?” Jacob asked as he flipped on the
inside light in order to inspect Jason’s wound more closely. “Seems like
every time I see you, you are bleeding in some way,” Jacob laughed.
“I am so pissed! You got whiskey?” Jason grabbed the bottle and took a
huge drink out of it. It burned his throat and made his eyes water. He
shook his head violently as he force the burning liquid down his throat.
“I hate my fucking life.” Jason sat back in the seat and looked out the
window into the night.
“Well, are you gonna tell me what happened
to you or what?” Jacob asked impatiently.
“Look dude, I got in a
fight with one of those Mexicans my dad hired. Now can we drive please?”
Jason said in a hostile tone.
“Fine. Don’t get emotional dude. What
were you fighting over?”
“Man you would not understand if I told
you. Besides, it is kind of embarrassing.” Jason said as he used his
t-shirt to wipe some blood off of his leg.
Jacob started the truck
and drove off down the road. The night wind felt good on Jason’s body. The
whiskey had made him sweat already. He looked over at Jacob who was taking
a drink from the bottle. His hands were so big. It was the one feature
that Jason had always admired most about Jacob. He was a good-sized boy.
At least 6 foot. He wasn’t too muscular, but not a body builder either. He
had blond hair and it was cut short. He was quite handsome Jason thought.
Jason was lost in his gaze as Jacob interrupted him. “You falling in love
or something dude?” Jacob laughed.
“You wish.” Jason snapped as he
turned his head.
“Dude you are absolutely no fun tonight. What is
up with you?”
Jacob asked in an aggravated tone.
“I just had
something happen to me that is really embarrassing and I really don’t want
to talk about it ok.”
“Well that is cool, but can we please have a
good time anyway.”
Jacob shot back.
“Sure.”
The night
passed. Both boys drank and laughed. Soon Jason had forgotten about his
ordeal with Gus. He had not been out with Jacob in a while and the two had
a lot to catch up on. Jason learned that Jacob and his girlfriend were not
getting along well. They had not seen one another in a week, and all they
did was argue over the telephone. Jacob also told Jason that he had signed
up for the navy. He would leave after Christmas. Jason and Jacob had
always been good friends. Jacob lived next to his grandparents, and they
would play all the time. Jason thought about how Jacob had changed over
the years. He used to be a skinny little kid with a big mouth. Now he was
a man, much larger and just a little more mature. Looking at him now, he
was a very nice looking boy. Jason felt himself attracted to his
manliness. Unlike he and Mike, Jason had never tried anything sexual with
Jacob. No reason really, he had just never thought about him in that
manner. Now he caught himself wondering what he would look like naked and
what it be like to have sex with him. Jason was brought out of his trance
when the truck started bouncing. Jacob had pulled off the road onto a
little dirt road that led back into some trees. They had come there many
times before to drink and talk.
Jacob had had a rough life. His
father had abandoned his mother just after he was born. Between
boyfriends, his mother had to work, so she was hardly ever around. The
second time his mother got married, the jerk that she married was totally
abusive to both he and his mother. Because of this, Jacob spent a year in
a home for troubled teens. His mother never even visited him. If it had
not been for Jacob’s grandmother, he doubted that Jacob would have made it
this far. His mother had left. Who knows where she is. He lived with his
elderly grandparents. They were real nice people, but they were old.
Needless to say, Jacob did pretty much whatever he wanted.
Jacob
parked the truck and opened the door. The night sky had darkened with rain
clouds. The wind had picked up some. Jason followed Jacob around the back
of the truck and sat on the tailgate beside him. They had both consumed
generous amounts of liquor and were feeling really well. Jacob started the
conversation. “So, what happened to you tonight. Before you got to the
church. What the hell happened? Why ain’t you wearing a shirt? And how did
you cut your leg? Man, your fucking eye is black as hell. Who were you
fighting with anyhow?”
“Damn, ain’t you full of questions. It was
one of those guys that dad hired to help with the tobacco. Gus is his
name. He hit me in the face and while we were scuffling on the ground, I
cut my leg. Nothing big.” Jason tried to sound convincing.
Jacob
knew that he was holding something back, but he didn’t know what. “Well
what were you all fighting over?”
“Who knows, he just attacked me
when I came out to my truck.”
Jason offered.
“You mean he
just jumped on you for no reason? I find that hard to believe.”
“Yeah I guess, I don’t know what the hell was wrong with him.” Jason
started to squirm. He knew that Jacob did not believe him. He was caught
in Jacob’s stare. He felt his heart flutter. Hopefully he would drop it
now. Just then, Jacob reached out and touched his face.
“What is
that shit on the side of your face?” Jacob asked. Jason hopped off the
tailgate and walked around to the mirror. He reached in the cab and turned
on the light. He was mortified at what he saw. All over the side of his
face and in his hair, was dried cum. Glowing white and matted in his hair.
He saw Jacob’s reflection behind him in the mirror. “Dude, looks like
somebody shot off on your face.” Jacob laughed as he reached out and
touched Jason’s face.
Jason turned toward Jacob, looking like a
deer in headlights. The look that he gave stopped Jacob’s laughter and
nearly stopped his heart. Jacob’s mouth fell open as he realized that was
what happened. Gus had made Jason suck him off. Jacob felt like an idiot.
No wonder he didn’t want to talk about it. And that comment he had just
made. Damn. How insensitive could he have possibly been? Standing there
looking at Jason’s little frame and that look of horror on his face, he
could only imagine how his friend felt after having something so
humiliating happen to him. Jacob stuttered and said, “Man, I am so sorry.
I was being a real asshole.”
Jason was stunned. Jacob had guessed
exactly what happened, on accident no less. His head started to spin and
he could feel himself sliding down the side of the truck into the wet
grass. He heard the thunder in the distance and felt the light rain start
to hit his naked chest and shoulders. He felt like crying or running away,
but he could do neither. It was like his body was numb. His leg ached as
well as his eye. He felt sick to his stomach. A secret that he had carried
for so long, and one of his best friends was getting dangerously close to
its discovery.
Jacob stood over him, wondering what he should do or
say; finally he broke the deafening silence. “Jason, you ok man? Look I’m
real sorry about that. I had no idea. Come on man, its starting to rain,
lets head to the barn over there.” Jacob helped Jason up and they walked
to the barn. Jacob nearly had to pack Jason. It was like his legs wouldn’t
work. Jacob wondered what had really happened.
After what seemed
like hours of silence, Jason started to speak. It was like he was not in
control of what he was saying. For so long he had these feelings pent up
inside him and now, he exploded. “Jacob, tonight as I was coming here, Gus
took me around behind the shed and made me suck him off. I tried to fight,
but he was too big. The worst part is, I liked it. I have always liked
it.”
Jacob’s mouth was hanging open. If he had heard his friend
right, he said that he liked to suck cock. That hit him in the face like
ice. “Well, umm, shit. Look Jason I don’t know what to say? I mean if you
like it, I guess you just do. Maybe you are just confused. I mean how do
you know that you like it? Well I mean I guess you know you like it or not
but, damn...why would you like that? You know he took advantage of you and
maybe it is like post battery trauma or something.” Jacob realized that he
was rambling, but he did not know what to say. He had no experience with
emotions, much less gay emotions, from his best friend.
“I don’t
think so.” Jason said in an annoyed voice. “This was happening before Gus.
This has been going on since I was like 12. I am pretty damned sure that
this is what I like.”
“Well how can you know what you like after a
one time thing? I mean you have never had sex with a girl, how can you say
that is what you like?”
“Well I just know, I don’t want to have sex
with a girl, and I have done it with more than one guy.” Jason said
without thinking.
“What? With who?” Jacob asked immediately.
“I don’t think that you really want to know that.”
“Do I know
him? C’mon you gotta tell me who it is.” Jacob was laughing now, almost
begging Jason to tell him who his partner was.
“It ain’t right to
say who man. All you need to know is that I know. Give me a drink of the
whiskey. I need some help with my sanity.” Jason said, reaching for the
bottle of Makers Mark.
“Well dude, I mean I just don’t know what to
say. Have you done other things with guys. You know like, you know, riding
punk or something?” Jacob asked in a confused curious voice. That was
another reason Jason enjoyed the company of Jacob. There was never any
telling as to what would come out of his mouth.
“What about riding
punk? You are a fucking moron. I mean for real, you are ate up with the
dumb ass.” Jason exploded with laughter.
“Oh excuse the hell out of
me. Do you enjoy anal sex?” Jacob said in his best British accent. “Like I
know what to fucking say. You the one that likes to do it...or whatever
you like to do with another guy.” Jacob pushed Jason’s small body and
tipped him over with ease. The two sat there in silence for a bit,
listening to the rain hit the tin roof of the barn.
“Yeah.” Jason’s
voice cracked a little.
“Yeah what?” Jacob looked at Jason like he
was a fool.
“I have rode punk.” Jason started to laugh
uncontrollably again, quieting long enough to take a drink of whiskey. He
was really getting drunk now. He could tell that his coordination was
getting farther and farther off.
“You drunk fucker. You are about
tanked. “ Jacob snagged the bottle from Jason’s hand. He shook his head
and turned the bottle up and took a large drink. The two sat there again
in silence. Jacob was thinking about what Jason had said. He really didn’t
understand it, but Jason was his friend and he knew that he had to try and
help him through this troubled time. He finally broke the silence. “So,
you gonna tell your parents? You know about you liking to do guys?”
Jason looked at Jacob and said, “Are you fucking retarded? Of course I
am not going to tell them. My dad would kill me or something. My mom, well
she would probably yell me to death. No way can I tell them, or anybody.
You’re just my bitch that’s why I told you.” Jason laughed as he elbowed
Jacob in the side.
“Yeah I got your bitch. You little smart mouth
fucker.” Jacob laughed as he pushed Jason over again.
Suddenly the
two boys heard something coming around the barn. Then they heard a voice,
it was Mike. “I thought that I would find you ladies here. What the fuck
are you all doing?”
“Hey man. Just having a heart to heart. What’
up with you?” Jacob asked. “Where the hell were you at tonight? “ Jacob
wasn’t a nuclear scientist, but he could read people pretty good, probably
because of the abuse that he received when he was a kid. As he turned to
look at Jason, and he saw the look on his face, he realized, to his horror
that Mike was the guy that Jason had been fucking around with. He started
to squirm. He was not sure what he should say or do. He finally realized
that Jason was really uncomfortable, but Mike was just like he usually
was. He thought to himself that that probably meant Mike wasn’t all for
anybody knowing. Jacob made a mental note to protect his friend as best he
could.
“Dad had some stuff that he needed me to do. I thought that
he was going to keep me there all night. Brought us another bottle though.
Damn Jason you look drunk already.” Mike laughed as he took a drink of
whiskey.
“What time is it?” Jason asked.
“About 11 o’clock.
Why? You got somewhere to be?” Mike asked.
“Just wondered. How did
you know where we were?” Jason asked as he took another drink from the
bottle.
“Just figured if you all weren’t at the church, you’d be
here.” Mike said. He sensed that Jason was uncomfortable, but couldn’t
figure out why.
The three boys went on drinking and soon they were
all laughing and having fun. Jason soon became more comfortable with the
fact that Jacob knew his secret. In a way it made him feel much better, as
though he didn’t have to carry the entire load anymore. Jacob was becoming
more comfortable with the things that Jason had told him. He was honored
with the fact that Jason had trusted him enough to confide in him. Jacob
didn’t quite understand it, but Jason was his friend and that meant he had
to be there. Jacob furthermore couldn’t understand Mike having sex with
Jason and with girls too. It didn’t make since, unless Mike was lying
about the girls that he claimed to be with. Still, Mike just didn’t seem
to be ‘like’ Jason. Jason’s small frame somehow made it easier to think
that he could be gay. Maybe because he assumed that gay guys were somehow
weaker. Mike wasn’t that way. He was big, strong and very boyish acting.
Jason was boyish as well, but he seemed somehow more in tune with his
emotions, which made him different from other guys his age.
The
three boys drank and joked up into the morning. Sometime around 1 a.m.,
the liquor overtook Jason’s memory. The next thing that he remembered was
the sun shining in his eyes. Jason squinted and started to stir. Jason
realized that he was not in his room, but he could not remember exactly
where he was. Jason rose up on his elbows and tried to look around. His
head was pounding and his eyes were blurry but he recognized this place.
It was Jacob’s room. Jason looked at the person next to him, it was Jacob.
Jason thought to himself how nice it was for Jacob to still be able to
sleep next to him after what he had shared the night before. Jacob started
to stir and then rose up on his elbows and looked at Jason. “How you
feeling man?” Jacob asked with a chuckle, rubbing the sleep from his eyes.
“Like shit man, I fucking ache all over and I think that a bus sneaked
in here last night and ran over me. How the hell did I get here?” Jason
asked, grimacing in pain.
“Dude you were wasted last night. By the
time we got back to your truck, you couldn’t even walk. I had to carry in
the house, so I brought you here. I sure in the hell wasn’t taking your
drunk ass to your house and let your mom and dad crucify us both. Mike
wanted you to go home with him, but after what you told me last night, I
figured that you two didn’t need to be together. You know he’d be on your
ass like nothing happening.”
Jason’s mouth fell open. “How did you
know it was Mike that I had sex with?”
“I could tell when he got
there last night. You just clammed up and I just realized that is was him
that you’d been doing. Last night when you were drunk, he was making all
of these dick sucking comments. So I figured that I had better take care
of your drunk ass so that you didn’t get fucked over. No pun intended.”
“Well I appreciate that, but you see that I am already screwed. It is
10 a.m. in the morning. I was supposed to milk. My parents are going to
kill me and bury me in the yard. I guess that I had better get home so
that I can be murdered.” Jason started to get out from underneath the
blanket and realized that he was naked. He immediately looked over at
Jacob who was standing next to the bed stretching. He was naked as well.
Jason’s mind started to race. Had he and Jacob done anything last night?
Surely not. “Umm...dude, why ain’t we wearing clothes?” Jason asked in a
nervous voice.
“You wanted to sleep that way and I always sleep
that way.” Jacob offered nonchalantly.
“Well umm, did we like do
anything or anything?” Jason asked.
“I was a perfect gentleman I
have you know.” Jacob joked as he through a pillow at Jason.
“Man
I’m glad to hear that. For a second there I was afraid. Well that we may
have, I mean...well you know.” Jason breathed a sigh of relief.
“Dude, I didn’t say that you were a gentleman. But I enjoyed it for real.
It was kind of freaky.” Jacob laughed as he arranged his crotch.
Jason nearly fell off the bed. What had he done? He simply could not
believe it. What a night...
The lightening was really bad. I could
here it sizzle as it hit the field outside, not far from the barn at all.
I could see the blue flash between the cracks in barn. The thunder roared
and boomed up through the hollows of the farm. The rain was pouring out of
the sky like mad. All in all, a typical summer thunderstorm in Kentucky.
The cows were standing in their stanchions. I had not started the
milking equipment because if the lightening ran in, it could fry them and
me too. So who wanted that? I sat there in the milk barn, waiting on the
storm to pass. I looked over at the clock and it was 5:30. I wandered what
Jacob and Mike were doing. I guessed that I would see them at the church
that night. I hadn’t spoke to Jacob much since the night that I spent at
his house. I am not sure at all what had happened there that night. When I
asked Jacob what happened, he just smiled, giggled and said that he didn’t
kiss and tell. Needless to say that this was not helping me to figure out
where we stood with one another.
The storm was just about over, the
rain was falling gently now and the thunder boomed in the distance. I
flipped the switch and heard the milk pump start. It was a familiar sound,
and I stood there for a second and thought. In two weeks, I would be gone
to college. I would hear this pump on the weekends, but not as often as I
used to. My heart sank a little. It was the small things like that I would
miss. I shook it off and grabbed the milkers and went into the parlor.
Milking went as usual that night. The cows were wet and that made
everything a little more nasty than usual, but nothing big. There was one
cow that had just had a calf. We couldn’t milk her yet, so she was still
in the stall with her calf. I went into the stall and saw that the calf
had finished with his supper, I grabbed the cow’s halter and lead her out
of the stall. We walked through the parlor. I wasn’t paying particular
attention to much, just going about my mundane chores. As we walked across
the concrete, going towards the door, a shovel that was hanging on the
wall fell and crashed into the floor, right behind Buttercup, the cow. It
scared the hell out of both of us, her more than me. She took off, running
toward the door. The concrete was slick with the recent rain and mud that
the cows had tracked in. I slipped and fell. Buttercup took it upon her
self to run over top of me and out the door.
All that I remember
was that I saw some stars. I raised up to see the cow bouncing across the
mud out behind the barn. “Fucking bitch cow.” I muttered. My hand was
hurting something awful. I looked at it, it was turning black and blue and
it was swelling quite a bit. I stood up, and leaned against the wall. The
pain in my arm was something awful. I gritted my teeth and pulled the door
shut. It was still raining as I made my way, as softly as I could to the
house. I came in the front door as I heard my mother screech about all the
mud on my clothes. She saw my arm and gasped. I looked down at it and it
looked pretty bad in the light. Mom grabbed her purse and we headed to the
hospital.
Just my luck, it was broken. My right hand at that. How
the hell was I supposed to do anything now? At least it got me out of the
milking chores for a couple days. I had a cast on it and it was pretty
unattractive. In a few days I realized that there was a great need for two
hands. One of the most inconvenient things that I noticed was the
inability to jack off. It was hard enough to use the bathroom. It was
hell.
About four days later, my dad figured that I could get back
to the milk barn. I grumbled a bit, but decided that I didn’t want to hear
his mouth. It was hard doing all the lifting, but I relied on my left hand
and pretty soon I was readjusted and getting along pretty good.
Anyone who has been in Kentucky in August knows how miserable it can be,
the humidity was high and it was at least 95 degrees. I was sweating like
mad and all the mud and cows weren’t helping things much. I had squatted
between two of the cows and I was taking off the milker. It took a bit
longer than usual with my cast. I heard the door open in the milk room and
figured that it was my dad or mom coming to check on me. My mom had been a
wreck since I had been trampled and made up so many excuses to come to the
barn, something she had never done before. I had managed to get the milker
off the cow, but it was full of milk and it weighed a good thirty pounds.
I lugged it over with my left hand and stood up. It was Mike. He was
standing there smiling that same luring smile and shaking his head.
“What’s up clutz? I heard that some freak over here didn’t know how to get
out of the way of stampeding cattle.” He laughed.
“Yeah piss off
you fucker.” I countered. “What the hell are you doing? Don’t you have
something else to do?”
“Naw, dad and mom went to some family thing
up in Ohio somewhere. Figured since you was such a little weakling, I
would wonder over here and give you a hand.”
“Aw well ain’t you the
sweetest fucker in existence.” I shot back.
“Who the hell is in
Ohio that your redneck family knows?”
“Some aunt, or cousin or
something. Never fucking heard of em. Alls I know is that I got the house
to myself and a nice big bottle of Makers. I was gonna ask for a hand job,
but since you broke your hand then I guess you’re outta luck.” Mike
laughed and smacked the brim of my ball cap.
“Here fucker, take
this and dump it in the cooler.” I handed him the milker.
That was
one thing that always amazed me about Mike. He was so cocky. He even
assumed that me giving him a hand job was my treat, not his. I guess he
knew that I was hooked on him and that I wouldn’t say anything. But I knew
what was going on. I liked his cocky attitude, so I let him be.
My
chores went along faster than usual with Mike’s help. When we were done, I
stopped by the house to tell my mom were I’d be. Then we took off to
Mike’s house. I hadn’t been there in awhile, but most everything was the
same. I had left my blazer at home and rode over with Mike. Deep down I
was excited at the thought of actually having Mike in a real bed. My
stomach fluttered every time I thought about it. But I tried to put that
out of my mind, for the time being anyway.
Mike flipped on the
television and I plopped down in the chair with my leg draped over the
arm. Mike bounced down on the couch. There was a baseball game on and we
sat there in silence for little while, watching the game. Mike jumped up
and ran into his room and returned with a bottle of whiskey. “Its drink
time...ya think?” I shook my head and hopped out of the chair and we
headed to the kitchen.
We had taken a couple shots a piece. I was
starting to feel really warm inside when Mike spoke up. “You seen Jacob?”
He had a little smirk on his face, one I only saw when he was teasing me.
“No.” I responded.
“Well I ran into him this morning. We had a
nice big chat.” Mike started to giggle. I felt like crawling under the
table. I didn’t know what to say so I said nothing. I made a mental note
to kill Jacob the next time I saw him. We continued our shots and before I
knew it, my head was swimming. I could tell that Mike was getting a little
bombed too because his speech was starting to slur. I stood up and walked
to the bathroom. I was still running through my mind what Mike had said
earlier. I wondered what Jacob had really said, but I knew that I would
never get the true story from Mike. I brushed it off as best I could and
joined him again in the kitchen. We drank and laughed the rest of the
night, so much so that parts of it were erased by the whiskey.
I
woke up and looked at the clock. It was almost three in the morning. I
raised up and realized that I was in Mike’s bed. The television was on,
but just static. I rubbed my eyes and looked over. Mike was there beside
me. I looked at him. He was almost angelic while he slept. His dark hair
was a little mussed, his mouth barely open so that his front teeth were
showing just a bit. He didn’t have a shirt on and his big hand was draped
across his chest. His skin seemed to glow in the pale light of his room.
My eyes followed his body downwards. His flat stomach gently rose and
fell. There was no hair there. The blanket was covering his crotch, but I
could see a small lump there. His feet and calves were uncovered. I
couldn’t help it, but there was just something erotic about a man’s hands
and feet. Mike’s fingers were long and thick, the skin was rough with all
the farm work, and his fingernails were trimmed short. His feet were pale
in comparison. They hardly ever saw the sunlight. His feet were wide and
strong looking and the skin was soft and smooth like silk, his toes were
wide. He was masculinity at its finest. My eyes returned to his face. He
was a beautiful person, and it was at that moment that I knew what love
was. It was true, I had tried to pretend that it wasn’t, but what I felt
for him was love. I stared at his face for quite some time and then
suddenly something happened. I knew what was going on, but it was like
something else was controlling my body. Sparks went through my body as my
lips touched his. I paused briefly, reveling in the feeling that I was
experiencing. I pulled back and was shocked back to reality when I saw
that his eyes were open. We looked into one another’s eyes. I think that
he could see the love I had for him. It was a moment that words would have
ruined. Our eyes peered at one another. It was like a really bad romance
film, but time was standing still. I searched his dark eyes for what he
was feeling, and I was sure that I saw his love for me as well. Our
upbringings made it hard for either of us to voice it, but in intimate
times like that, you cannot mask the message that your eyes send.
As the emotion rushed through my body, Mike did a very unexpected thing.
He reached up and grabbed the back of my head and pulled my lips to his. I
was shocked at first but then I submitted to his request. We kissed for
what seemed like hours. Mike rolled me over onto my back and we laid
stomach to stomach, his tongue in my mouth. I was in heaven. I could feel
his hard dick pressed against my thigh. Mike was somewhat taller than me
and our parts weren’t always in a matching position. My hands were all
over his back, I could feel his muscles flexing. I slid my hands down to
his ass and pulled him as close to me as possible. My cast got in the way,
but I managed as best I could to keep the touch soft. I could smell him,
his bed and room smelled like him. His scent was mixed with soap and
deodorant. His skin was soft and cool to the touch. It was actually cold
in his room because of the air conditioner, but I was on fire on the
inside. Mikes hands slid down my sides and onto my ass. Mike used his
knees and to spread my legs apart and sat up. He gave me a quick smile and
leaned over and picked up a bottle of lotion up from the floor. I smelled
it’s scent as he applied it to his crotch. I heard the crackle of the
lotion as he massaged his cock. I sat up and took his nipple into my
mouth. He kept stroking himself and threw his head back. I pawed at his
chest like a mad person, he responded with deep breaths and moans. I fell
back to my elbows, as I knew what he wanted. He grabbed my ankles and put
me into position. I felt him pushing into me. I clenched my teeth at the
pain. He went slow, but I would have taken any amount of pain to please
him at that moment. I grew used to his intrusion and soon, I was so turned
on that I could hardly handle it. I hooked my knees over Mike’s shoulders
and he made love to me as though we were never going to be together again.
I gazed into his eyes as he pleasured the both of us. Mike wrapped his
forearms under my shoulders and grabbed me, holding me tight. I wrapped my
legs and around his waist and I pulled his face close and kissed him. At
that moment we both exploded, me between us and he inside me. We were both
out of breath and panting like rabid dogs. He collapsed on top of me and I
felt so secure with his weight on top of me, like the world was problem
free. We both drifted into sleep.
I woke with my face against
Mike’s chest. His breathing was so peaceful, his arms wrapped around me. I
ran through my mind the events that had taken place. I had never known
Mike to be that gentle and loving. It was a side of him that scared and
fascinated me. Till that day I had only fucked, but never made love. The
feelings were nearly more than my brain could process. I wondered what
time it was, but hesitated in breaking our embrace. Reluctantly I did, and
it was 5:30. I realized that I had to go and milk. As I rolled to the side
of the bed, Mike roused up. “Hey dude, where ya going?”
“I gotta go
milk.” I said as I rubbed my eyes. My body ached because of the whiskey
that I drank. I stood up and stretched and turned to look at him in the
bed. He was yawning and had his hands behind his head and under his
pillow. He looked at me sleepily. His nipples showed in the light. “You
gonna get up and take me back?”
“Why don’t you take my truck, milk
and then come back.” Mike flashed his beautiful smile at me again.
“Sure, but why would I want to come back here for?” I tried to play dumb,
to see if he would say what I wanted him to.
“Cause I am going to
need some breakfast you bitch, and I don’t feel like cooking.” He smiled.
Though he didn’t say it, he wanted me to come back for a repeat
performance. I realized that this was something that he and I both had
trouble communicating about. So I decided that I would leave the words out
and follow the body language.
I searched for my clothes, some of
which were strewn into the hall. I walked over to where he was laying and
twisted his nipple gently and told him that I would see him later. I
swiped his keys off the kitchen table and bounded into the morning
darkness. The stars were shinning brilliantly. The air was cool, but
sticky. The moon cast a pale light across the lawn. What a beautiful
morning it was indeed.
I was on cloud nine. The night that I had
spent with Mike was the most wonderful night of my life. I felt a
connection with him that I had never felt with anyone else. It was almost
as if I had been alone until that moment when we fell into one another’s
arms. Mike and I had had sex several times before, but this time things
were different. Before, it was just movements to get our rocks off. Last
night, it was emotional and intimate, something that didn’t happen much
within my family.
Now maybe I was just thinking too much, or maybe
it was meant to be that way, but as I sat in the milk barn, reviewing in
my mind the events that had happened the night before, I realized that I
had crossed a line. At least when Mike and I were having sex, I could
explain my feelings with the need for sex, I could justify my attraction
to him by being a horny teenager. Now, my heart was saying something
different. It was like permanent butterflies in my stomach. No man-made
substance could be that intoxicating. That very intoxication is what
worried me most though. My heart was now telling me that there was
something more than sex. I was coming nearer to the fact that I would soon
have to face my feelings and my sexuality, something that I really had no
intention of doing.
The milking chores went smooth that morning.
Around noon I headed off to the back pasture to fix some fence that a
neighbor’s cow decided to tear down. I walked along a narrow cow path that
led to the creek. The giant Oak trees were gently swaying in the summer
wind. In the heat of the day, not many living things were active. The
grasshoppers buzzed to and fro as I disturbed them by walking down the
trail. I saw the cows in the shade at the bottom of the hill, some were
laying down, some standing. They chewed their cud and swished their tails,
not paying much attention to the fact that I was there. I stopped about
half way down the hill and from my vantage point the view was exquisite.
The grass had yellowed some under the intense summer sun. The pasture was
spotted with red and white clover, yellow dandelions and the occasional
daisy. The cows had mowed the grass short, allowing the rocks that were
scattered across the field to shine like gems in the sun. I turned and
looked back up the hill, from that viewpoint, the sky contrasted the
pasture in an almost religious manner. The sky was so blue that one needed
to squint to look at it. The smells of nature were overwhelming, the
sweetness of the grass was intense and the scent of the cows danced on the
wind. Though one might not think a cow could possibly smell good, to those
from a farm, the smell is comforting because of its familiarity. I watched
some sparrows dancing on the limb of a small tree nearby, they chirped
excitedly over some thing that obviously excites sparrows. I realized that
I was smiling at the bounty of nature before me. I laughed to myself,
thinking that I must look like some kind of dork standing in the middle of
the field gawking at things like I had never seen any of them before.
Guess you could say that I was just stopping to smell the roses.
In
two weeks I would leave for college. I was excited but a little afraid as
well. I had spent my entire life on this farm and it was all about to end.
I felt what might possibly be called gloom at the fact that my life would
soon change. I had always had reasons for not being able to go and try new
things, I had to work on the farm, in a short while I would be stripped of
that excuse and would be forced to enter the “outside” world and fend for
myself. Quite a daunting task to a young man like myself. As I continued
down the path, my mind wandered to Mike. I giggled like a child at the
intense feelings that our relationship gave me. I was starting to confront
the fact that I liked men and I was comforted that Mike would be there to
go through all these new feelings with.
I arrived at the fence that
needed mending. Armed with a hand full of steeples and a hammer, I set to
work repairing the fence. I couldn’t have been there for five minutes when
I heard footsteps approaching me from behind. I turned to see Julie, a
girl that I went to high school with walking down the trail. It was a hot
day, and I had chucked my shirt off and I was sporting a pair of
camouflaged pants and work boots. I suddenly became uncomfortable about
being half undressed. Julie and I had talked some in school, we had even
kissed a couple of times, and somehow I knew her intentions were to get a
little closer to me. I smiled at her as she hopped across the rocks in the
creek. We talked for a bit as we sat in the grass, next to the creek under
the shade of a big Sycamore tree. I was aware that she was sitting really
close to me and I could even feel myself acting differently as she slowly
reached over and touched me on the leg. Her brown eyes pierced mine and I
was like a deer in headlights. Now you would never believe this in a
hundred years, but Julie and I sat, talked some more and before I knew it,
we were rolling around on the ground kissing like mad. Events unfolded and
it turns out that the day after my passionate night with Mike, I lost my
virginity to a girl, Julie.
While it physically felt okay, my mind
and heart wasn’t in it. As we were getting dressed, I noticed two big ruts
in the ground where I had dug the heels of my boots in. I laughed a little
at the strangeness of the situation. She was totally unaware of my inner
turmoil. We talked casually as I finished repairing the fence, then we
walked back towards my house. Julie left soon after we arrived at my
house. She kissed me good-bye on the cheek and I sort of stood there in a
daze. I couldn’t believe what had just happened. I was so confused. I had
sex with Julie, not because I wanted to, but because I felt I had to. All
the other guys in school talked about having sex with girls, so when the
opportunity presented itself, I took it. Now I just felt like a piece of
crap. Whatever kind of relationship I had with Mike, having sex with
someone else couldn’t be good for it. On top of that, I had been as
intimate as a person could be with a girl, that I didn’t want and that I
used as some sort of experiment to see what other guys were really going
on about. It confirmed that I definitely preferred men, but that only
served to make things worse with my feelings. My head started to spin and
I felt as though I may be sick to my stomach. I plopped down under the
tree in the front yard and watched the cows across the road. If only my
life could be that simple, eat grass and sleep. Some species have all the
luck.
That night, as I was milking, Mike popped in to say high. As
I looked him up and down, that intense sensation of adrenaline rushing
through my body returned. I could smell him, and it was driving me mad. I
instantly became hard. Mike noticed and couldn’t pass up a chance to
harass me on my obvious willingness to please. He laughed and tweaked one
of my nipples, telling me to calm down, I would have a chance to ride him
soon. I laughed nervously and told him to fuck off, but deep down I knew
that he had my number. I leaned against the wall as he came closer to me.
I felt his hand slide onto my crotch and I closed my eyes as his lips met
mine. His tongue slid inside mouth and I sucked on it ever so gently. He
pulled back and then leaned in and whispered in my ear that he couldn’t
wait to get me in his bed again. I could feel his hot breath on my neck
and ear and it seemed as though I was paralyzed. I had no words to
counter, so I stood there looking up into his face. He was truly a
beautiful creature. Of all the things that I had done in the milk barn,
kissing my friend full on the lips was definitely a new one. Mike’s
presence seemed to heighten all my senses, my skin felt every movement in
the air, and my nose could smell Mike and his distinct scent. And of
course my eyes were as big around as Frisbees, I was just pitiful.
Mike turned and said that he had to run, but that we could meet at the
church about 9 and finish our, ummm, conversation. He turned and walked
toward the door and as he was going through it, stopped and turned toward
me. The words that came out of his mouth nearly caused me to drop to the
ground. He asked about Julie. I instantly knew that he was aware of the
little rendezvous in the pasture today, how I haven’t a clue. I was a
mixture between embarrassed and scared. He had a really strange look on
his face as he said that we would discuss it later. He had an unusual
authoritarian tone in his voice that both intrigued and frightened me. And
for a moment, I thought I saw pain in his facial expression. I was
immediately overcome with guilt. I felt guilty about using Julie the way I
did, and now I hurt Mike’s feelings, what a complete fuckup I had
performed in the last 12 hours.
I finished the chores and headed to
the house to get ready and go meet Mike. I wasn’t really sure what the
night would be like. So I was a little reluctant. I jumped in the shower,
my mind seemed to be stuck on the look on Mike’s face as he left the milk
barn. I put on some clean clothes, grabbed a sandwich and jumped in my
truck and headed to St Ivo. Mike was there when I arrived. He had a bottle
of whiskey with him and we took off in his truck. I was unsure as to what
to expect, but I was soon to be very aware. I was hardly prepared for the
scene that ensued.
We rode along for a few minutes without saying
anything. The radio was playing some country music song that I didn’t
recognize. I looked out the window, and then glanced over at Mike. He
seemed to be deep in thought. I wondered what was on his mind, but was a
little afraid to ask. Mike finally broke the silence when he asked if I
had enjoyed sex with Julie. I wasn’t sure how to answer, so I decided with
the middle of the road approach. “It was OK.” I said.
“Well that is
cool I guess.” He commented blandly.
“How did you know? I mean it
just happened this afternoon.” I queried.
Mike smiled and looked
over at me. “Well, lets just say that Julie beat me to the punch.” He gave
me a suggestive wink and then took a large drink from the bottle. For a
minute I was confused as to what he meant. Then it dawned on me. He had
been watching. I was mortified. The first time I had sex with a girl and
my male lover was there to critique my performance.
“You mean, you
saw us, what we were...oh man.” I stuttered. Mike laughed a hearty laugh
and slapped men on the shoulder. I knew that I would be teased about this
for some time to come.
“Well stud, judging by her moans, I say you
were tearing her up. I was getting kind of jealous, you know seeing you
paw on her like that.” If there had been a way that I could have gotten
under the seat of the truck, I would have. This was just nightmare-ish.
We pulled into the church parking lot and pulled around behind under
the trees. I was feeling no pain from the Makers Mark I was drinking. When
Mike stopped, I decided I needed a walk. When my feet hit the ground, I
stumbled a bit and fell over a tombstone. Mike laughed, I gave him the
finger, with a big smile on my face. Mike jumped out and walked with me
down the trail that led to the woods behind the church. I suddenly was
overcome with questions for Mike. What did he feel for me, if anything?
Was he gay? Was I? Were we lovers or fuck buddies? They all seemed so
“girlish” so I just kept quiet. Mike broke the silence once again by
commenting, “Well I was sort of taken back that you and Julie were, you
know, doing it. I just assumed that you didn’t have any interest in girls.
Not that there is anything wrong with that.” Mike stammered and tried to
apologize for pointing out the fact that I like guys.
“I didn’t. I
don’t. I don’t know what the hell I was thinking. Guess I wasn’t.” I
countered. Mike grabbed my shoulder and turned me to face him. The night
sky was almost navy blue. The moon and stars were shining through the
leaves of the trees. The crickets and frogs were calling. Mike’s tall
frame was just a dark figure. I looked up at him and at that moment
realized just how much bigger he was than I. Mike must have been reading
my mind, that or the things I needed to hear were written on my forehead.
“Jason, you know that I like you. You know, in that way. When I saw
you with Julie, well at first I was sort of turned on, you know seeing you
two going at it like mad animals. But then I felt hurt, you know like you
were, well cheating on me. I didn’t really like it.” Mike’s face was
shadowed, but I could tell he was serious and even though it wasn’t the
profession that I was dreaming of, it was still good for a country boy who
wasn’t supposed to have emotions anyway. Mike sealed his profession as he
kissed me hard and deep. My head started to spin and I felt myself submit
to his every whim. My shirt got ripped as we fell into passion. The dew on
the ground was damp as he laid me down in the grass, never breaking our
embrace. His touch was electric and I felt my body come alive as he
stimulated all my senses. He touched all the right places and pushed all
the right buttons. I was elevated to heights of ecstasy that I had never
dreamed of. Mike was so attentive to my body’s every need, my lips, my
neck, my chest, my stomach, nothing escaped his passionate onslaught.
I looked up and watched him shed his clothes in the moonlight. The
moon reflected from the skin on his shoulders. He looked as though he were
a god on earth. I quickly sat up and worshiped his body with my every
move. I caressed him, kissed and licked him. At that moment there was
nothing real except for the two of us. The world was miles away. Mike
entered me with a sense of urgency and need. I kneeled in front of him,
begging him to use my body for his worldly desires. Though his size was
somewhat discomforting, I would dare not ask him to stop. His big hands
grasped my shoulders, pulling me into him. I moaned with ecstasy. He
leaned forward and wrapped his arms around my chest. He placed kisses on
my neck and shoulders and even slid down to my mid back. His gentle kisses
drove me wild. He hugged me tight and I could tell by his breathing that
he was nearing the point we both begged for. With a gasp, a moan and a
firm thrust, he exploded. My body rejoiced at his presence. My own hand
wondered down to my midsection and with a few thrusts, I exploded into the
dew soaked grass. Gasping for air, we gently slid down to our sides,
squeezing one another so tightly that a hurricane could not pull us apart.
I had no words that could thank Mike for the way he had made me feel.
I opened my mouth and “I love you” came out. I felt Mike tense. My brain,
a step behind at this moment, had spilled my inner thoughts before I could
help it. I laid there, not knowing what to do or say. Mike said, as he
tightened his grip around my chest, “and I love you too Jason.”